I don’t know. I have always…ALWAYS…been shy. So shy that I would run away from my own family as a child when they came over for a visit. Now-a-days its not THAT bad but I don’t think its much better. I always feel like I’m being watched. When I’m outside I avoid people if at all possible. And even If I can’t I try to get away as fast as I can. I turn down for partys. I guess I always feel like I’m going to be made fun of. I don’t want to feel this way though and do want to participate in groups and partys. When I was in school I would sit at the back because I didnt want the teacher to pick me to answer a question.

That being said when I’m around that I know EXTREAMLY well I don’t feel hindered by this. I can talk, even quite loudly. And be goofy. I guess because I know they won’t make fun of me (or if they do i’ll know their probably just joking around).

I guess my question is do you think I have a disorder? I’m honestly starting to beleve I do.
I should probably state that I do have mild OCD. And this makes me check repeatedly to see if someone is in the bathroom even when I know their not. And other things like that.
Ive never been to a doctor about either of these. Ive never told anyone about it either. This would be the first time. But i think i really do have ocd (in like i MUST do this or i will become anxious or paranoid)
Yes I see what you mean. I always feel like I’m being watched all the time. That I’ll make a of myself or people wont like me. Like, it feels like it consumes me. If I’m and a couple other people are coming at me than all i feel is "get the out of there" kind of feeling.

I really dont want to feel this way. I try my best to be social but its just really really hard.


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